Those Kiwis have always been a clever lot – except when it comes to their political system, when one particular gentleman can be voted out  (more than once) – yet, because of the proportional representation system, can end up in the Parliament in a position of real power  (which, to my mind, will come back to bite the PM on the bum).

Anyway, I digress – back to those clever Kiwis. When plastic bags were banned from supermarkets, the customers quickly came up with a solution – they instead decided to take their goods home in the supermarket shopping baskets – you know the ones you put your groceries in whilst selecting your goodies. An Auckland supermarket has reported that they have lost almost 200 in one month!

Which reminds me of a Melbourne band called “I Spit on Your Gravy”, who found another use for the supermarket trolley. They tipped it on the side, lit a fire on the bottom and barbecued odds and sods on the top ‘grill’. My mate Phil Grizzley, lead guitarist from the aforementioned band, said it worked a treat, as long as you didn’t mind burnt offerings to which he added: “After all what is tomato sauce for?”.

Sadly, as sopping baskets are plastic these days, such dual usage will be out of the question. Planter boxes anyone?

And what about the canny Kiwis? They, whilst Aussies and others have entertained Harry and Meghan ‘right royally’, have taken them to the smelliest place in the world (Rotorua), made them rub noses with all and sundry and, as the crowning glory, entered them in a gumboot throwing competition (which, out of interest, Meghan’s team won). All of which cost buggar all, but the rumour that the Prime Minister presented them with a supermarket shopping basket full of plants she had personally picked/stolen from the Botanical Gardens is just not true.

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